‘…His testimonies are sure, making wise the simple….’ – Ps 19:7
Praise the Lord ! It is indeed the greatest experiences on earth, to think back and thank God for all His goodness, His ways His love and His leading.
Life is full of surprises for all of us, some expected some unexpected, some deserving while others undeserving, some painful while some joyful , few just come along and others forced into our lives, some that leave a mark some that may be forgotten, some that has taught us a lesson, some that taught others through our lives…My life though had all of these flavors, I would like to bring few that left a mark in my soul which I thought was forgotten they taught me a value so important for this run that I am running….and as I write, I pray that this may touch your life too in a very special way.
The little me:
I was born to my parents after a long prayer. Prematurely born, yet brought joy into the family who were waiting for their first child. My dad was working in the Indian army then and the first comment he would receive on his way to see his first child was, ‘Kutty Chaya you have a daughter who looks just like you….’ That was the first miracle!!
I remember clearly those days when I was at my school in India. Studying in a convent school, truly taught me the importance of morning and evening prayer. I was 10 years old when this particular incident happened. My mother while dressing me to school traced a small tumor behind my left leg, at first she just ignored but as days passed by she noticed that the tumor was growing and I slowly started to find it uncomfortable. She would daily ask me if it was painful, I would say no. Finally, my mom one day took me to the hospital and after a series of scanning and tests; the doctors diagnosed me with a benign tumor which needs a surgery to be removed. My mom just could not accept the fact and she was wailing all the way from the hospital to home. It was decided to take me to the Osmania Hospital in Hyderabad for the surgery, dates were decided and my father joined us.
My parents were in a dilemma yet if this surgery should be done, because the doctors said if it is not done, it may affect the way I walk and my mom feared the after effects of the surgery to the leg. Finally, my dad said let us first go to the hospital and take the second opinion of the doctors at the Osmania. We took a train to Hyderabad and in the same compartment we were travelling, we met a family who were going to a convention and after my mom narrated the incidents to them, they invited us to the meetings; it was easy for us as the meetings were held in the same hospital grounds. We stayed in a hotel, next day early morning I had my first consultation with the doctors, who asked me to come the following day for some tests, so we went for the meetings.
When the man of God was praying for the sick, my parents took me to pray. In prayer he said, ‘God bless’. As soon as the prayer finished, I felt a deep stinging pain in the left leg where I had my tumor. It was hard even to walk. We hired an auto and we went to the hotel room and to our disbelief the tumor has vanished!!!
My father and mother took me to the doctor the next day and they were checking and cross checking but they couldn’t fine the benign….the tumor is gone!!! The doctors concluded in my report, ‘Benign disappeared!’
Col 2:14 ‘having erased the charges that were brought against us, along with their obligations that were hostile to us. He took those charges away when he nailed them to the cross.’
Jesus erased the need of a surgery. I learnt a lesson there, benign in my life is experience God’s power through pain. The first time I experienced God in my body was through pain…and it was the beginning.
There was period of four years that we, myself and my two brothers, had to be away from our parents. My parents moved to the Middle East for better opportunities. It was tough to handle certain moments, being the elder one among the three. But God was trying to teach me how important it is to bond deeply with my siblings and understand the responsibilities in my parent’s absence. I thank God it was only for 4 years!!
Arrival to Doha at the age of 14years was the beginning of a new chapter in my life. Parents love and their concern started to have a new meaning for three of us… just like the morning dew on a flower….life continued to be bliss until I left for my higher education to India. My younger brother would join me in the next year and we were together once again alone in India.
We preferred up down to and fro to our colleges, although it was far away for both of us. We travelled together in an auto to the bus stand and would part ways in different buses to different colleges. I never knew that even in life’s journey, I would have to part ways, after a short journey together. We enjoyed the evenings together and the prayer time when he would give me a D on his guitar (He loved his guitar) to sing ‘When the music fades’, the church, the ICPF gatherings were the moments we spent together in His presence. We taught songs to the children for monthly ICPF gatherings. The time I wish & pray would continue in eternity. He was more to me an elder brother than a younger one (3 years to be precise). He had a very special place in my life. As I write this, tears wouldn’t stop to remind me of his sincere love….16th September 2000, my brother left us to be with the Lord.
Life turned its back on me. I dint find a reason to live….the thought that l lost my brother was too hard for me to take in. The word pain could never contain even today what I felt for my loss!!! An ambitious I lost the hope of a new tomorrow. Bitterness entered my soul and started eating away all goodness the Lord has been doing in our lives. I groaned day and night, complained God and questioned him. I would slowly slide in the night to go to the terrace and cry loudly to God pouring out my complain to him. Heaven remained silent!
All the while I forgot about the pain my parents and my youngest brother were enduring. We as a family were writhing in pain in our worlds, untold to each other even to this day. As days moved, we started feeling it in our activities. I had been an ICPF leader, but after this loss, I stopped going to any gatherings. My spiritual being was becoming weak day by day. It was at this time that God sent a man of God to speak to me. He was Pr.P.C.Mathews, he spoke God’s word to me and said, beautiful flowers are picked up by the gardener, you have no right to ask the gardener for you are but another flower’ This changed my thought, I ran into the arms of the gardener for comfort. He comforted me through His word, He started giving me new hope; I could see the sun shining again through the clouds.
I completed my education, reached Doha. The pain I saw in my youngest brother was once again hurting, but as they say deeper wounds take time to heal, it took long years for him because he not only lost his elder brother but a companion, a friend who was his world. But thanks be to God who did not allow us to be consumed in this fiery trial.
My mother, my best friend, the strongest inspiration to me to this moment, shocked me when she was evangelizing people who came for my brother’s funeral. She talked and contrary to the usual routine, my relatives did not retaliate but heard her. They heard her speak of the salvation, the goodness of the Lord and His plan for us and the hope. Time and again I went to her and tried to interrupt her but she would not keep calm, the Love of God in her heart was so overpowering than the pain that was kept for her. My father once told me that God spoke to his pain and sent His word of comfort in a very special way. God spoke of how the father endured the pain when His son was on the cross…God told him that it was all for a purpose which time would reveal.
As a family we came out of this distressing episode with the help of my church, Bethel AG, Doha.
Waiting for a promise
I entered into marriage on 18 June 2005. It was God’s plan to bring Anish and be a part of God’s bigger plan. I thank my parents and brother for him.
Philippians 4:6-7 we find one of the most difficult verses in the entire Bible to obey in times of impossibilities: “Don’t worry about anything; instead, pray about everything. Tell God what you need, and thank him for all he has done. If you do this, you will experience God’s peace” (NLT), but my husband taught me by living it. When I met him for the first time and as he shared his vision for life, I never imagined it was so big a challenge. He accepted me and taught me how to live it. He taught me how… to do one thing at a time (yet to master it). I am just amazed by the way he is even at the most difficult of times…I have learnt to wait for the promises and saw how beautiful it is. And I remember the typo on our thank you card at our wedding ‘Welded forever’ truly that was from God.
16th September 2009 (the date cannot be a co-incidence) God helped to start a Hindi services and in February 2010, under the auspices of Rev.Pr.T.J Samuel , he was ordained as Bethel AG Hindi Pastor. As a family we committed our lives to serve our Lord and Jesus leads us. Pastor P.M George has been a great support and his exemplary leading an encouragement for this ministry.
For eight long years we did not have children and as a family we have been waiting for a promise to be revealed.
I was diagnosed with endometriosis and a laparoscopic surgery did not help me either. There were times I just wept before His presence and my tears to God said it all. During gatherings, when mothers sat and talked of their children, I would just stare them with a heavy heart. We as a family were praying for couples with no children and soon God was blessing them. We started giving names to the children, but our bosom continued to be empty.
It was during this time that God blessed us with the Sunday School Ministry, which is now Children’s Bible School. The ministry is been such a blessing to our lives. The love of children, their presence filled our emptiness. Serving them, encouraging them even today is a joy to our soul. Every Thursday we come and chant together ‘God is good all the time’, it was and still is Gilead’s oil to every situation of our lives.
Every Friday, the church would take our names and pray and heaven had mercy on us. September 2012, I was tested positive with twin pregnancy and my joy knew no bounds. After three months, I lost one child and the pregnancy of the remaining twin was very risky. No devil can thwart God’s plan for his children. By His great mercy and love, on 22 May 2013, after a painful and impossible pregnancy, God blessed us with Aaron Anish, who constantly reminds us of God’s miracle. Aaron’s discharge sheet still has a note that remarks, child went to distress during birth. Satan fought till the last moment, but prayers and anointing broke the yoke. The doctors who helped me said, ‘you both did it’. The lesson I learnt, ‘The promise did it.’
2 Corinthians 1:20 ‘For all the promises of God in Him are Yes, and in Him Amen, to the glory of God through us.’
The pain that brought us from good to better:
I was very happy that I joined an organization for work in 2008. It was a blessing, lots of responsibilities, new roles; new field and it all came in as a plate of delicious dishes.
The year 2013 was a tough training for me and family. In May, after celebrating our son’s first birthday, with my in-law parents from India and blissful month, little did I know what was awaiting us the next months. One after another, we were bombarded with challenges and severe trails, but God helped us overcome every trial and turned our trials to testimony.
August 11th, 2014 the day I was blessed with my niece Ann, I got a call for an interview and after an elaborate process and a great deal,God helped me join the Sidra Medical Research Centre. Now I know, that it is truly beautiful to be a part of God’s plan.
It is difficult when a door closes at our face, we feel rejected and painful but it takes us a while to learn the lesson that it was God’s only way, of taking us from good to better.
What makes David run? David was acutely God-conscious, God possessed and God taught. He was a God-intoxicated man. It was the Love of Christ that made David run. May the good Lord help each one of us run for Him as David.
In the words of Robert Frost:
These woods are dark and deep
But I have promises to keep
Miles to go before I sleep
Miles to go before I sleep……
God Be Glorified – Ancy Anish